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Crucial Conversations
Style Under Stress Assessment

The Style Under Stress Test is a 33-questions assessment that allows you to see how you respond in specific crucial conversations in a specific relationship. The results indicate your natural tendencies to move toward silence or violence and it indicates the skills or tools in dialogue that you use well or need to improve in.

Please read the instructions first as they help you answer the questions in a specific and helpful way.


The following questions explore how you typically respond when you�re in the middle of a stressful situation.

Instructions:

  • Relationship. Before you get started, think about the relationship you want to explore with your boss, a coworker, a direct report, a friend, or family keep this relationship in mind.
  • Circumstance. Next, think of a tough circumstance one where you might slip into either silence or violence.
  • Apply. Now, with that relationship and circumstance in mind, respond to the following statements as either true or false.

Crucial Conversations
Style Under Stress Assessment

The following questions explore how you typically respond when you�re in the middle of a stressful situation.

Instructions:

  • Relationship. Before you get started, think about the relationship you want to explore with your boss, a coworker,
    a direct report, a friend, or family member. Keep this relationship in mind.
     
  • Circumstance. Next, think of a tough circumstance - one where you might slip into unproductive behavior.
     
  • Apply. Now, with that relationship and circumstance in mind, respond to the following statements as either true or false.

  • Please be sure to answer every question and enter your contact information at the bottom.
1. At times I avoid situations that might bring me into contact with people I�m having problems with. True
False
2. I have put off returning phone calls or e-mails because I simply didn�t want to deal with the person who sent them. True
False
3. Sometimes when people bring up a touchy or awkward issue I try to change the subject. True
False
4. When it comes to dealing with awkward or stressful subjects, sometimes I hold back rather than give my full and candid opinion. True
False
5. Rather than tell people exactly what I think, sometimes I rely on jokes, sarcasm, or snide remarks to let them know I�m frustrated. True
False
6. When I�ve got something tough to bring up, sometimes I offer weak or insincere compliments to soften the blow. True
False
7. In order to get my point across, I sometimes exaggerate my side of the argument. True
False
8. If I seem to be losing control of a conversation, I might cut people off or change the subject in order to bring it back to where I think it should be. True
False
9. When others make points that seem stupid to me, I sometimes let them know it without holding back at all. True
False
10. When I�m stunned by a comment, sometimes I say things that others might take as forceful or attacking�terms such as �Give me a break!� or �That�s ridiculous!� True
False
11. Sometimes when things get a bit heated I move from arguing against others� points to saying things that might hurt them personally. True
False
12. If I really get into a heated discussion, I�ve been known to be tough on the other person. In fact, they might even feel a bit insulted or hurt. True
False
13. When I�m discussing an important topic with others, sometimes I move from trying to make my point to trying to win the battle. True
False
14. In the middle of a tough conversation, I often get so caught up in arguments that I miss how I�m coming across to others. True
False
15. When talking gets tough and I do something hurtful, I�m quick to apologize for my mistakes. True
False
16. When I think about a conversation that took a bad turn, I tend to focus first on what I did that was wrong rather than focus on others� mistakes. True
False
17. When I�ve got something to say that others might not want to hear, I avoid starting out with tough conclusions, and instead start with facts that help them understand where I�m coming from. True
False
18. I can tell very quickly when others are holding back or feeling defensive in a conversation. True
False
19. Sometimes I decide that it�s better not to give harsh feedback because I know that it�s bound to cause real problems. True
False
20. When conversations aren�t working, I step back from the fray, think about what�s happening, and take steps to make it better. True
False
21. When others get defensive because they misunderstand me, I immediately get us back on track by clarifying what I do and don�t mean. True
False
22. There are some people I�m rough on because, to be honest, they need or deserve what I give them. True
False
23. I sometimes make absolute statements like �The fact is�� or �It�s obvious that�� to be sure my point gets across. True
False
24. If others hesitate to share their views, I sincerely invite them to say what�s on their mind, no matter what it is. True
False
25. At times I argue hard for my view hoping to keep others from bringing up opinions that would be a waste of energy to discuss anyway. True
False
26. Even when things get tense, I adapt quickly to how others are responding to me and try a new strategy. True
False
27. When I find that I�m at cross purposes with someone, I often keep trying to win my way rather than looking for common ground. True
False
28. When things don�t go well, I�m more inclined to see the mistakes others made than notice my own role. True
False
29. After I share strong opinions, I go out of my way to invite others to share their views, particularly opposing ones. True
False
30. When others hesitate to share their views, I do whatever I can to make it safe for them to speak honestly. True
False
31. Sometimes I have to discuss things I thought had been settled because I don't keep track of what was discussed before. True
False
32. I find myself in situations where people get their feelings hurt because they thought they would have more of a say in final decisions than they end up having. True
False
33. I get frustrated sometimes at how long it takes some groups to make decisions because too many people are involved. True
False
 
   

VitalSmarts� 2002

Southam Consulting & Vital Smarts

Southam Consulting has partnered with Vital Smarts to provide evaualation and training tools and resources to get you headed in the right direction.

 

 

 

 

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